Shattered

Tomorrow is the 28th.. Sigh. i don't know how long has it's been, i don't even know why i still feel like it was just yesterday. My last relationship, which was Beautiful.. absolutely Wonderful.. took me months after the break-up to figure that out and now i'm stuck with " Why Did I Do That? " ..so one day i came across a song which remind me a lot about my situation, I've been listening to it.. almost everyday until now.

SHATTERED (MTT VERSION) - TRADING YESTERDAY

Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding. 
Fall into your sunlight. 
The future's open wide, beyond believing. 
To know why, hope dies. 
Losing what was found, a world so hollow. 
Suspended in a compromise. 
The silence of this sound, is soon to follow. 
Somehow, sundown. 

And finding answers. 
Is forgetting all of the questions we called home. 
Passing the graves of the unknown. 

As reason clouds my eyes, with splendor fading. 
Illusions of the sunlight. 
And a reflection of a lie, will keep me waiting. 
With love gone, for so long. 

And this day's ending. 
Is the proof of time killing, all the faith I know. 
Knowing that faith, is all I hold. 

And I've lost who I am, and I can't understand. 
Why my heart is so broken, rejecting your love, without, love gone wrong, lifeless words carry on. 
But I know, all I know, is that the end's beginning. 
Who I am from the start, take me home to my heart. 
Let me go and I will run, I will not be silent. 
All this time spent in vain, wasted years, wasted gain. 
All is lost, hope remains, and this war's not over. 
There's a light, there's the sun, taking all shattered ones. 
To the place we belong, and his love will conquer all. [x2] 

Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding. 
Fall into your sunlight.

..I've realized that i never actually put a real effort to fight for the relationship, to sustain the feeling she once had toward me, to be the guy who actually make her fall in the first place. i put SO much efforts to make her fall toward me and once she did.. sigh. IF this is the Karma for what I've done.. haunted by the guilt of letting down the one who gave me happiness, I've suffered enough .. i can't change the past, i can only let it change me. If somehow you manage to read this.. I'm Sorry.

..it's been years now. There are still more days to be filled with " Shattered ♫ " to keep reminding me of what a fool i can become.

“Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.” 
― Henry Wadsworth Longfellow